How To Recover From a Toxic Friendship

Most of us have experienced a toxic friendship. It may have started as early as grade school; the two of you did everything together. But you noticed the dynamic changed as you grew and became adults. Maybe they were short-tempered, made sarcastic remarks, or gave you back-handed compliments. Perhaps they went one step further and lied, cheated, stole, or betrayed you.

Whether you met in school or at work, when a relationship turns sour, it can leave us reeling. How do we trust others again after experiencing such pain? How do we recover from a toxic friendship?

Tips for Recovering from a Toxic Friendship

The first step in recovering from a toxic friendship is forgiving them. This doesn’t mean that you need to try to salvage the friendship. You only need to release the burden from yourself. Set yourself free from their behavior. This takes grace on your part; even if you never tell them that you have forgiven them, it will lighten your load.

The following are several tips for recovering from a toxic friendship and taking care of your mental health.

Admit that the friendship was toxic Acknowledge that your friend’s behavior is not acceptable. Friends do not actively seek to hurt others, nor do they target someone close to them. This person has their own issues to work through, and they’re taking it on you. It’s time to move on.

Grieve over the loss of a friend It’s okay to grieve over the loss of a friend. You cared for them, and they may have been a big part of your life. Take the time to mourn the loss of the relationship.

Set boundaries for peace of mind You may miss your friend, or at least the way they used to be. That is natural. But you need to set boundaries for future friendships to protect your peace of mind. Respect yourself enough to know when someone is mistreating you.

Distance yourself Distance yourself from any toxic friends. Those whose actions leave you feeling drained or hurt. Limit their access to you. That might mean not taking their calls or only communicating with them if you must. If you work together, keep interactions limited to work.

Take care of yourself Prioritize your self-care during this time. Aim to eat healthier, exercise consistently, and strive for good quality sleep. Spend time on your own interests and hobbies. Don’t be afraid to take on new challenges to help you grow.

Form new friendships As you heal from a toxic relationship, be ready to form new friendships. Look for people with similar interests to you. Nurture old friendships that you may have placed on the back burner because of a toxic friendship.

Don’t give in Don’t go back to your toxic friendship just because you are feeling lonely or you feel bad for cutting them loose. They have their own issues that they need to work through, and you cannot “fix” them. Don’t give in. Instead, focus on forming positive and healthy relationships with others.

The world is a big place, and you will find your people. Continue to look and pray for God to bring the right support into your life.

Seek Support

Removing yourself from a toxic friendship and learning how to forgive and move on can be challenging. No matter how much you cared for your friend, they’ve made their position clear. You must protect your peace and mental health.

Reach out to our office today to schedule a session with a Christian counselor who can help you start on the path to forgiveness and freedom, while drawing you closer to Christ, the true friend.